The laundry had flooded from the love seat over to the big couch. The clothes were clean and folded but the task seemed endless. We had left our house in a hurry two days before and I hadn’t gotten to the dishes. They stared at me waiting for my attention as I flitted between starting the oven for squash and trying to keep up my end of the conversation I was trying to have with my mom. As the oven heated up I began to sweat. Lu was in her crib whining about nap time and I was feeling the burn.
My six month old has decided that the only way she would like to go down for a nap is on my chest, and in the dark. I usually oblige, as I am not one to turn away a baby snuggle, but today I felt pressed. There was SO MUCH to do.
The whining intensified as I scraped out the squash guts into a bowl. My uhm hmms to my mom had become less frequent as my post baby brain reached it’s maximum operating limits. The guts held strong to the orange flesh as I scraped and scraped until…. plop… The whole bowl turned onto the floor. Stepping through seeds, I grabbed a rag to clean the mess, got off of the phone and struggled not to cry. I hate days when the simple to-do’s feel insurmountable.
I pulled Lucie from her crib and held her close to me in the darkness of her room. Her left hand stroked her own hair while her right hand held my cheek. Soft kisses landed on the bridge of her nose until she sank into a deep sleep. It took five minutes to feel the weight of a baby deep in slumber but my arms never tired. My heart recharged. Five more minutes passed as I enjoyed her little snores. Five minutes of praying for her growth today and all of her tomorrows. Five minutes of enjoying her right in the middle of now, her six month hilarity.
She laid back down in her crib without waking. The squash made it into the oven, the dishes were washed, more clothes were folded and readied to be put away. I am thankful that those pesky seeds splattered when they did, forcing me to stop and smell the baby hair.
Maybe I can even sneak in some coffee before she wakes!